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Plot Summary: A Killer Vacation (Literally)
What if your dream beach getaway came with murder, steamy hookups, and an island full of psychopaths? That’s Sinners Retreat in a (bloody) nutshell. Kindra, our plus-size, tough-as-nails heroine, attends a yearly retreat dubbed “Sinners Retreat” aiming to find—and kill—her brother’s murderer, the Abattoir Adonis. No pressure, right?
Things get spicy—and messy—fast when she meets a hot, glasses-wearing, nerdy stranger on the plane. Direction of travel: booty call. Destination: Homicide Island. The shocker? He’s… the killer. Yep, the Abattoir Adonis himself, Ezra. Cue the awkward realization that makes a restraining order sound like foreplay. And yet somehow, sparks fly amid the bloodshed. Goodreadslaurenbiel.com
Characters & Chemistry: Hot Mess Meets Hotter Murderer
Kindra – A cinnamon roll dipped in justice and served with a side of smut. She's fierce, caring, and verbally gluttonous in all the best ways. When she blurts out things like, “I talk when I’m nervous. Which is apparently all the time,” she sums herself up perfectly. Goodreads
Ezra / The Abattoir Adonis – Charming, lethal, and secretly brooding, Ezra is the kind of killer you definitely shouldn’t root for—but will anyway. The guy can lethally diss someone while adjusting his glasses. It’s unfair. Goodreads
The Supporting Cast – Think serial-killer bowling with severed heads, pineapple-themed rituals, and a disembodied romantic hand. These side characters are gloriously twisted, dropping in to fuel chaos, mayhem, and dark giggles. Letty Readslaurenbiel.com
Tropes Galore: Dark Romance’s Greatest Hits
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Black Cat × Cinnamon Roll – The prickly, driven FMC pairs with a sweet, adoring MMC—who also happens to be dangerous. It’s opposites attract, with a body count
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One-Night Stand Gone Multi-Day – Surprise! Your one-night stand is the reason you signed up for this bloody retreat.
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Forced Proximity – When you only trust someone with a weapon… and also lust over them.
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Enemies-to-Lovers – “I want to gut you. But also maybe make out?” Classic.
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Serial Unaliver Pairing – They both kill people, and somehow we’re swooning. Goodreads
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Dark Humor – Murder mixers, chainsaws, toys, ropes, sensory drowning, and yes—cannibalism (joked about, but firmly non-consensual). laurenbiel.comLetty Reads
Trigger Warnings: Handle With Latex Gloves
This is not a Hallmark Valentine romance. If you’re squeamish, maybe glance away:
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Explicit gore, murder, and body horror—all served with a side of smirk.
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Cannibalistic humor (joked as the only non-consensual content).
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Chainsaws, hammers, drills… pick your weapon.
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“Ghost peen”—because this book stops at literally nothing. laurenbiel.com
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Off-page references to CSA, sensual drowning, disembodied hand romance, toys and ropes.
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Smut—yes, the erotic bits are hot enough to make the blood circulate faster.
Writing Style: Sharp, Smutty, Snark That Cuts
Biel isn’t subtle, and that’s part of the fun. Her prose zips from “LOL” to “WTF” to “OMG” in one sentence, and she’s a pro at landing emotional punches mid-chaos. One reader confessed they:
“…laughed so hard I had to read it out loud to my husband. He still gave me that weird look.” Letty Reads
The dialogue sizzles—snarky innuendos, wounded confessions, and deadly secrets all wrapped in one-liners you’ll quote until you panic at harmless mayonnaise. (“I still can’t look at mayo the same.”) Letty Reads
Pros & Cons: Why You’ll Swipe Right—or Swipe Left
Why You’ll Flip Your Lid (in a good way)
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Original premise – A romance set at a serial-killer resort? Wild and brilliant.
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Tight chemistry – Kindra and Ezra’s connection is weirdly hot, emotionally messy, and irresistible.
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Humor meets horror – You’ll laugh at chainsaws like they’re stand-up comedians.
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Emotional grit – Under the ridiculousness, grief and longing lock you in.
Why It Might Not Be Your Jam
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Tone whiplash – Some may find the swing between gore and romance jarring.
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Supporting characters are secondary – They’re fun, but not deeply developed.
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Trigger city – Even die-hard dark romance fans could flinch at the intensity.
Final Verdict: A Vacation You Can’t Unbook
Sinners Retreat isn’t for everyone—and it shouldn’t be. But if you love your romance twisted, your humor dark, and your smut spicy enough to rival a murder, buckle in. Lauren Biel delivers a book that hacks rom-com, thriller, and erotic dark comedy into a single, deliciously unhinged package.
Rating: 4.5 out of 5 Bloody Pineapples (because only cannibalism jokes get half stars)
Grab your survival kit (and your vibrator), because Sinners Retreat is one hell of a ride. Just don’t leave your eyebrows unattended.
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